Feeling worried that you might be a narcissist is usually a sign that you are not one, because genuine narcissism typically involves very little self-doubt or concern about how one’s behavior affects others.
What “narcissist” means
Clinically, “narcissist” usually refers to narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), a mental health condition where a person has an exaggerated sense of self-importance, a strong need for admiration, and a consistent lack of empathy that shows up across many areas of life. People with NPD often feel entitled, believe they are superior, and may regularly exploit or manipulate others for their own benefit.
Normal traits vs. disorder
Almost everyone can be selfish, self-centered, or attention-seeking at times, especially under stress, and that is not the same as having NPD. With NPD, these patterns are persistent, rigid, cause problems in work, relationships, or daily life, and the person usually does not see them as a problem.
Common narcissistic traits
Mental health sources describe traits such as:
- Grandiose self-importance or superiority, often exaggerating achievements.
- Constant need for admiration and attention to feel good about oneself.
- Lack of empathy, frequent exploitation of others, and violation of boundaries.
These traits generally need to be strong, long-lasting, and present in many contexts to suggest a personality disorder.
Why your worry matters
Being anxious about whether you hurt others, feeling guilty when you are selfish, and questioning if you are “too self-centered” are usually signs of empathy and self-awareness, not narcissism. Many people who are kind and thoughtful fear being narcissistic, especially after difficult relationships or seeing content online about “narcs.”
What you can do next
An online narcissism questionnaire or screening test can give you a rough sense of where you fall on the spectrum, though it is not a diagnosis. If this fear is causing distress or you recognize several of the strong traits above in yourself, talking with a licensed therapist or psychiatrist is the best way to get a clear, professional assessment and support.
